Self Care for Beginners
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When You Feel Like You’ve Hit Rock Bottom as a Mom
By Rachel – Homemaker to Many
Parenting is hard. Being a mom is hard. Add solo parenting and multiple children — it’s even harder. We all struggle. Some more than others, but it doesn’t have to stay that way.
Yes, there will always be ups and downs, but we can learn to enjoy it, live in the moment, and even embrace both the good and the bad.
First and foremost, it starts with taking care of yourself.
I know, I know — you’ve heard it a thousand times. But how are you really supposed to take care of yourself when there’s sooo much to do? Let’s get this straight: if you feel like you’ve hit rock bottom, things can only go up from here, right?
It’s going to be tough at first and it’ll take a lot of willpower and self-discipline, but let me tell you — it is worth it. YOU can do this.
Take it from me — not long ago I was so depressed and hopeless that I couldn’t imagine ever enjoying life again. I didn’t know what “fun” felt like. I barely took care of myself. But you have to. It’s too important not to.
Where Do You Start?
1. Time with God
You know it’s true. You can tell yourself you don’t need to go to church, or that once a week is enough — but deep down, you know that’s not it. You need time with Jesus.
Every time I miss a Sunday at church, my entire week feels off — and so do my kids’. Miss a Wednesday too? Whew, you better steer clear of the Brooks household! 😅
With traveling and missing church often, we’ve had to find ways to keep Jesus at the center of our lives every day. So start with church and reading your Bible — even if it’s just one verse a day. Then work your way up to a chapter.
📖 Tip: Try a Busy Mom Bible like this one. It includes 5-, 10-, and 15-minute mini-studies to make staying in God’s Word easy, even on your busiest days.
2. Shower
That refreshing feeling after a shower can change your mood in an instant. Whether you do it in the morning to boost your energy or at night to relax, it’s necessary.
Personally, I feel so much better when I at least do my hair and get dressed for the day. The messy mom bun and sweats just aren’t for me. It never fails — if I’m a hot mess, someone shows up unexpectedly! Then I’m left feeling low and embarrassed.
👚 Try this: Lay out your outfit the night before so it’s one less decision in the morning.
3. Sleep
Seems impossible, right? Kids don’t sleep, bedtime is chaos, there’s too much to do, and your mind won’t stop racing.
But here’s the truth: you need sleep. Give in — let the kids fall asleep watching a movie, sleep with a sibling, or even with you if that’s what works. Then give yourself a bedtime and stick to it.
Most people need about 7–8 hours to function well. If you’re pregnant or have a newborn, you’ll need more (and that’s okay). Put your phone away, close your eyes, and get some zzz’s.
Don’t overdo it either — too much sleep can tank your energy. If you’re trying to fix your schedule, start waking up just 15–30 minutes earlier every couple of days until you reach your goal.
😴 Can’t sleep because your mind won’t shut off?
Try valerian root supplements. I take 1 for anxiety, 2 for mild insomnia, and 3 if I really need to knock out. One side effect is vivid dreams — and for me, that actually worked in my favor!
4. Eat Right
What’s made the biggest difference in my mood and energy is an elimination diet. I cut out nearly everything — especially processed and fatty foods — and slowly reintroduced them to see what triggered issues.
Fast food? Can’t do it anymore. Soda? A rare treat. I didn’t realize how much those things affected my body until I stopped eating them. Eggs and sugar also make me feel awful, so I avoid them too.
💧 Start small: Focus on adding good habits before taking away bad ones. Begin with drinking more water every day.
I drink two of my Simple Modern cups before lunch, then “reward” myself with a glass of tea. Months later, I still do it — and it works!
5. Exercise
I’m notorious for skipping workouts. Isn’t chasing five kids and cleaning houses enough? Apparently not!
Even on my busiest cleaning days, I’ve learned that unless I intentionally work out, my mood isn’t where it should be.
I have two bad knees, so it’s hard to stick to a plan. But you know who helps me most? My kids. Especially my 15-year-old, Tucker. He holds me accountable.
We’re both night owls, so we like to work out together before bed. I’m told mornings are better, but hey — you have to do what works for you or you’ll never stick with it.
My favorite app? Supernatural on Meta Quest. Gym memberships aren’t realistic for me, and working out at the park usually ends in two or three kids crying. 😂 So I make it work at home.
👟 Tip: Get a friend, your spouse, or one of your kids to be your accountability buddy — and make it fun!
6. Do Something You Love
Being a mom to many can make you lose yourself. I’ve never loved the saying “you’re more than just a mom,” but I understand it now.
I absolutely love being a mom to many — I wouldn’t trade it for anything. But as my youngest grows more independent, I’ve started doing little things just for me again.
Drawing with my kids, making macramé projects, practicing photography, and blogging all bring me joy.
🎨 Idea: Make a list of five small things that make you happy — and schedule at least one every week.
It reminds you that before you were a mom, you were great… and when your kids are grown, you’ll still be great.
Final Thoughts
You’ve got this, mama. ❤️
Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish — it’s essential. The better you care for yourself, the better you can care for your family. Don’t be afraid to talk to a doctor or therapist if you’re really struggling.
I’m all for natural remedies, but neglecting your mental health affects not just you — but your sweet babies too.
So give yourself permission to start small, trust the process, and know that healing is possible.
You’ve got this.
<3 Rachel
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